Something churned within my soul today. It was an ugly realization but the better of me decided to start here and start now, while he's still in the flesh. Who knows how much time I have to draw from the man who half-heartedly made me and whole-heartedly hopes to mold me.
Today I explained to him the notion of optimism and pessimism via a cup of iced coffee from 85* (his admiration for this place deserves its own blog post). I then accused him for seeing everything half empty and casting an aura of negativity that will never lead him to happiness, no matter where he runs or how he hides. Divorce is not the answer to all his woes and all the riches in the world cannot buy health and happiness. There are plenty of things he ought to be grateful for and he should work on altering his perspective.
And then it dawned on me that I've been guilty of negativity and lots of it...so much that it has had an adverse affect on many levels of my personal and professional life. I've fooled myself for so long, thinking I was always in the right even when my perspective overshot the positives. I somehow managed to gain false strength by finding faults in others. Hating. Berating.
Some self-correction is needed and I'm not sure how a blog about my dad would help, but I sense that this may be the start of something much greater.
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